To tell you honestly, when I was on the road, miles, and miles of it, it just felt right. Sometimes I get attacks, dregs, what have you, of a nomadic-romantic feeling that I want to stay at a certain destination for a period of time, but also move along somewhere else after that. Do you get that too? When you're on the road, the perfect music plays on the radio, you're with your friends, and you just talk. You talk about life, you talk about your dreams, you talk about what may be, or what might have been? It was beautiful. Too beautiful. It was a sunny daydream in a listless sky. It doesn't make sense, but...it does.
I want to constantly feel, experience, renew, each place, each moment that I am away.
When you reach that place, you feel you belong. But you know also that you must move on. Look for another place, because at that moment, you are supposed to be where you are supposed to be. But then that moment passes, and everything must just remain a memory. A picture, a feeling, a song in your heart. You must move on.
Ever since we moved away from our childhood home, and my parents having to migrate into a different country, I felt uprooted. Certain places felt right, but none ever felt like home. Somewhere I can say that I am rooted in. That when I go out and just be at peace with the place, with the people, with the community.
Maybe this is why wanderlust takes over. For the moment, I will let the universe take over the longing in my soul, to look for whatever it is I have to look for. There is a nagging feeling in my heart that there is something more, but for now, I stay put. Feel wherever this is taking me. Do the best I can. I cannot wait where the universe will lead me next.
I'm sorry dear reader, if you are rather confused at what I just wrote. And I do apologize for my writing at this time. It seems that words, sometimes, cannot fully catapult my feelings into paper (or cyberspace, eh). I am bursting with a longing that I cannot fully fathom. And so for now, I leave you, with nothing else but my desire to be in a different place, in a different time.